


A New Start

by TheOneWithItAll



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order (Video Game)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Pre-Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:06:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25659451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneWithItAll/pseuds/TheOneWithItAll
Summary: Cal Kestis faces difficulties in the aftermath of Order 66 and his master's death.
Relationships: Cal Kestis & Jaro Tapal
Kudos: 29





	1. Broken

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place just after what we see of Order 66 in Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order.

_Why? Why did this happen? Why did they do this?_ These thoughts and more raced through Cal Kestis’ mind as his escape pod made its final descent to the planet’s surface. He was still reeling in the aftermath of the events he had just witnessed. He still didn’t understand why the clones had turned on him. On _them_.

As he looked down at his master’s lightsaber, a single tear fell and hit the hilt near the emitter. It trickled down towards where it had been damaged by the clone troopers’ blasters and fell to the floor of the pod near Cal’s boot. He glanced over at the body of Master Tapal. The sight made Cal lose any sort of control of his emotions.

Without realizing it, he tapped into the ability he had begun to learn in the months prior. He was filled with a wealth of memories from his master’s lightsaber. He saw a young Jaro Tapal inserting his blue kyber crystal into the double-bladed lightsaber he had crafted with the assistance of an ancient droid. He saw his master, an adolescent youngling Lassat, being chosen by a Jedi Knight to be trained as their padawan. He saw Tapal complete his trials, earning the rank of Knight.

Cal became overwhelmed by his deceased master’s memories that had been attached to the lightsaber. He experienced one after the other, seeing the day that Tapal was elevated to the rank of master and the day that he chose to take on a young Cal Kestis as his padawan learner. Memories of the subsequent years flooded Cal’s mind before he could stop them. The entirety of the Clone Wars played through Cal’s mind, from the beginning at Geonosis to the end on Bracca. Cal saw himself through his master’s eyes in the hours before _it_ happened. Just when the clone’s betrayal started entering his mind, Cal threw the lightsaber at the pod’s viewport, gasping for breath over the countless scenes that played in his mind.

All the emotional weight Master Tapal had carried around over the decades of his life suddenly added itself to the trauma Cal had been through in the moments leading up to his escape. Cal couldn’t bear to look at his master’s body again after seeing so much of his life. His master’s emotions from right before his death still burned in Cal’s mind. Grief, distrust, anger, and frustration coursed through Cal’s body. But overwhelming all of these were hope, peace, and acceptance.

Cal closed his eyes and covered his ears as the escape pod entered the atmosphere of Bracca. He tried his hardest to remember his own memories, not the ones that had bulldozed their way into his mind. Master Tapal’s words echoed in his ears. “Trust only… in the Force.” However, Cal had damaged his connection with the Force when he threw the lightsaber away in his rage, though he wouldn’t realize this until he would need his connection to the Force more than ever.


	2. Grounded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cal tries to get a handle on his situation following Order 66.

Cal woke up after an unknown amount of time following his pod’s crash. It was hard to tell what time of day it was due to Bracca’s constant cloud cover. After opening the escape pod’s hatch, Cal spotted a familiar rock formation that had been partially destroyed by a falling Separatist dreadnought. He knew that there was a small settlement nearby that had started scapping the dreadnought’s remains for parts, but he had no idea if he would be any more welcome there than he and his master had been on the _Albedo_. He contemplated traveling to the settlement, but he would have to wait until the weather calmed. Even if he wasn’t shot on sight when entering the village, he didn’t want to chance getting caught in one of Bracca’s horrific storms.

Cal ducked back into the pod and sealed the hatch shut. He did his best to adjust his large master’s body onto one of the seats, but it proved difficult due to the massive Lassat’s frame and Cal’s small stature. He propped the corpse against the seat and sat it upright to avoid tripping over it.

“I’m sorry, Master. You deserve so much better than this,” Cal whispered while trying to hold back a tear. Before he got too caught up in his emotions, Cal turned his efforts to find the pod’s survival pack. It would contain enough rations for four people for three days, meaning Cal could stretch them for twelve days at the very least, and even longer if he couldn’t find another food source. It also contained basic medical supplies, which might come in handy if he sustained any minor injuries.

While emptying the kit, Cal found an emergency transponder that would ping his location to any nearby Republic ships. He wondered if he should entertain a small hope that what happened to him and his master was an isolated incident, or if turning on the transponder would seal his fate. Cal opted to leave it alone for the time being but wondered if it could be his ticket off Bracca. 

_What should I do, Master? What would you do?_ Suddenly, his master’s last instructions and the words he had repeated on at least daily rang throughout Cal’s mind. “Trust only in the Force,” Cal said while kneeling. He assumed the position he had been taught to meditate in when he was still a young child. Cal opened himself up and reached out to the Force just as Master Yoda taught him those many years ago. It felt… different than what Cal had grown used to. When he would normally feel the calming embrace of the Force, he felt… cold.

Cal opened his eyes and saw his master’s lifeless body. He remembered the other piece of advice that he had given to him in the moments before his death. “Wait for the Council’s signal,” Cal mumbled as he rose for the uneven plane of the pod’s floor. Cal knew what he should do. If his master was still there, he would have waited for the Jedi Council to reach out to them rather than trying to make contact, and Cal would do the same. The Council had never failed them before, so there was no reason they would fail Cal now.

Cal went back to the rations and pulled out enough to satisfy his hunger, but no more. He wasn’t sure if he would hear from the Council soon, and he wasn’t about to blow an entire day’s worth of rations if it would be a while before he was found. He looked over at his master and knew that he probably would have sacrificed most of his rations for Cal even though the large Lassat would need more food than Cal could even eat. 

_Thank you, Master._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit longer than the first chapter, but I wanted it to have a bit more substance. I hope you enjoyed it!


	3. Renewed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One Part of Cal's life ends and a new one begins.

Life. Death. Beginning. End. Start. Finish. The duality of the two concepts had been in many of the lessons Master Tapal had taught Cal in the weeks leading up to the betrayal. The talk of the end of the Clone Wars had triggered uncertainty in Cal, who hadn’t known a galaxy  _ not _ at war for nearly three years. Master Tapal tried to explain to Cal the important lesson of the need for an end to every beginning, and that a start isn’t a start without a finish. Cal tried to remember the lessons his master taught him. The Clone Wars were over, but something new had started, and Cal didn’t know what.

“I can’t believe it’s already been a year, Master. It doesn’t feel like you’ve been gone that long.” Cal looked at the pod that had brought him and Master Tapal down to Bracca. It had started rusting in certain spots and the paint was chipping here and there. Cal rubbed his hands over the scorch marks that scarred the hull. A slow release of faint memories trickled into his mind, but they weren’t any different from the ones he had experienced over and over again in the year prior. Cal recoiled once he reached the all-too-familiar moment in which he was forced to say goodbye to his master, but it didn’t stop him from getting a taste of it.

Cal stepped back from the pod and looked over at the remains of the pyre he had built for Master Tapal. He couldn’t force himself to go near it again. It had been hard enough for him to have a solitary ceremony for his fallen mentor. He had attended a handful of funeral ceremonies during his years at the Temple, though he hadn’t known the deceased. The one he remembered most was for an old comrade of Master Tapal’s who had perished in the earliest days of the war.

This one had been different.

Cal turned away before he broke down and headed for the small cave he had discovered in his early days on Bracca. The escape pod was designed to serve as a temporary living space, but Cal couldn’t bring himself to spend any more time than necessary in it. Once he finished stripping it for parts and supplies, he sealed the hatch and didn’t open it again. 

His cave was really more of a hollowed-out boulder. Cal made sure that nothing was using it as a home before he settled one using it for a shelter. He didn’t want to wake up one night realizing that he had stolen another, more nasty being’s home. Master Tapal hadn’t sacrificed himself just so Cal could get eaten in his sleep immediately afterward.

Once he reached his cave, more melancholy feelings flooded Cal’s mind. “This is it,” he said to himself. “No more being by myself.” Today would be the day he would go into the scrapper nearby scrapper settlement and seek any work he could get. He had been pondering it the last year, and today would be the day he would take the leap and make his presence known.

It still terrified him, though. He wouldn’t reveal that he was a Jedi to anyone. If the Clones, the soldiers of the Republic, had sought to kill him, he only wondered what the scrappers would do to him. If he had been such a target then, he couldn’t begin to imagine how much of one he was now.

It wasn’t just that either. Not all of the inhabitants of Bracca had been on the side of the Republic. Even if the Republic had turned on the Jedi, Cal wasn’t positive he’d be welcomed with open arms by Separatist sympathizers.

He finished packing his bag, which didn’t take long at all, and took one last look at his cave. “So long,” he said with a small catch in his throat. He hadn’t been living there long, but he had still grown attached to the little cave. He knew it probably was against the Jedi Code, but he couldn’t help it. 

With that, he got up and made for the settlement. It wasn’t a long journey, only about half a day, but Cal still got an early start. He didn’t want to be caught alone after dark in the event he lost his way. It wasn’t a difficult journey either, but there was one fairly treacherous stretch that led him through along a steep cliffside. As he walked along, there was a brief moment he thought he felt the ground giving loose, but he had thankfully been mistaken.

As he neared the settlement, Cal stopped and collected his thoughts. He went over what his story would be. Who he was. Where he was from. How he got here. He had decided that he would keep the name “Cal,” though he would drop his last name. He didn’t want to be too identifiable, and he felt that the less the scrappers knew about him, the better.

As for where he was from, he would say that he was the only survivor of a refugee ship. It was unlikely that anyone would believe him, but it was a good enough cover. Plus, it wasn’t entirely wrong…

“Here’s to endings and beginnings,” Cal whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the ending! I originally intended for this to be 8 chapters, but 3 seemed to work better. I wanted to leave Cal in a place that makes sense to his journey in the game while also offering at least a partial conclusion to what I started. I hope you'll enjoy reading it as much I enjoyed writing it!


End file.
